Book report by Aiden Rigby, age 7

I am Aidan Rigby I am 7 and this is my book report

necrowombicon

This is a drawing of daddy’s book I took for the report. He does not know I took the book but I promise to give it back right after I finished. It is made of leather and kind of stinks but it’s got a funny little face on it.

Daddy brought this book home when I was five. Mommy said your not bringing that in here and he said yes I am and she says over my dead body you basturd. Mommy went to sleep for a while after that.

The book is hard to read cause its not written in American but after awhile I could read it anyway but there are lots of big words I keep having to look up like squamous, which is the name of my new pet worm. Dady couldn’t read the book either at first but my grnapa taught him how.

necrowombicon1

My granpa smells like too much aftershave and used to bring me bags of licorise but then he went to sleep for a while. Now mommy talks with granpa’s voice and she teaches daddy about the book too. It’s pretty much the same as it was before, they even still jump on the bed Saturday night and but daddy isn’t so happy about it.

Reading this book makes my head ache because the words won’t stay on the page and the book smells kind of funny like that time I held a magnifying glass on a Barbie. Daddy says it will open a door, I guess because the bathroom door gets sticky sometimes and won’t open.sometimes the words make a face and it talks to me and says that if we team up we can beat my granpa. I like that because I don’t think it’s fair that he always wins at chess.

The book doesn’t have animals or knock-knock jokes which I like, but it does have pictures even though some of them are scary and have people bits. The words are very boring and it was probably written by someone in a boring suit with a brown tie. I would give this book a big fat D for dumb, because it doesn’t try to teach me anything useful and it keeps making screaming noises. If you liked this book you’re probly boring too, and you’d probly also like a fork in the eye.

necrowombicon2

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under microfiction

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s